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MelonShalad

22 Movie Reviews

7 w/ Responses

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Yeah?

This is an excellent

If the animation weren't solid, I don't believe I would have watched as far as I did. Both fight scenes are emotionally boring, as neither of the parties (both times) mean anything to me as a viewer; I have no clue who they are, as the characters are painfully under developed.
It appears to be structured very similarly to that of a video game, except it doesn't work the same way. In a video game YOU control the main character, therefore there is no need to develop the character the same way you would for a film. This would have been so much better if more time were spent making me care about this character, instead of senseless fighting for the first 3 and a half minutes and the final 4 minutes.

A little under 50% of this first episode was spent on FIGHTING between 3 different parties, none of which I know anything about, or have any emotional connection towards. The rest was exposition and backstory.

I look forward to what you have in mind for the continuation. Thank you for pushing the independent animation envelope.

FEEDBAAACK

I'm only leaving feedback because I love it so much and I wanna see what more you're capable of form here forward.

My main criticism that I noticed early on, is that the first couple minutes or so felt like they were going no where, and the premise for the rest of the short was only introduced about 2 minutes in.

Music was fenominal, my only gripe as far as ears go, is that the sound design was lacking, if any at all. Felt more music oriented than anything, which may have been intentional; if so, you're doing great there; if not, sound effects for some of the things happening on screen would further push what exactly is going on, sound design is one of the most important aspects of a film. The sounds at which materials interacting makes gives a lot of subconscious cues as to what those materials are, and give us a lot of information in terms of whats happening even. Sound design is like a story told beyond visuals and if often overlooked.

The animation was amazing. I felt as if at some points it was a collab however. The sudden changes in style made me feel like multiple people animated it, and I tried looking to see who all animated on it, but it was just you. All was great, sudden shifts in style however didn't quite feel right.

Take what I have as a grain of salt, or take it to heart. Either way, I needed to say this, because I myself needed to hear it. I know how important criticism is, and wish people would give it to me more. So just doing my part.

Cant wait to see what's next.

gildedguy responds:

Very valuable feedback, thank you so so much!

Damn, this looked like it mighta been a pain in the ass to make! Clever clever. Well done

Rediskot responds:

Thank you! And yes, it was super annoying wrestling with the uncooperative dough, I didn't choose the best recipe for it :P

man this is fucking terrible

Incredible commentary on what I took away as potential technological Singularity. Well done David. If I were a woman i would kiss you on the mouth.

have my children

aap responds:

I'd like to receive your children but my rental agreement says I can't raise children in this house, they'll find out and we'll be homeless, so I can't I'm sorry.

5 stars

who ate all the hamburger helper?

jessejayjones responds:

GRAMFELDDDD!!!!

Age 25, Male

United States

Joined on 11/22/15

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